One day I was in a bad mood with my girlfriend
One day I was in a bad mood with my girlfriend. I picked up a bottle of wine next to me and took a sip, and found that the smell was not right. At first glance, it was the gasoline I just added. When I was a child, my parents taught me to calm down when I was in trouble, so now I calm down a cigarette without rushing!
Said they have a lot of them
My husband gave me a transparent fake seagull at night and said they have a lot of them. Bring me to play. I looked left and right and asked her husband, why do you say it has its head tilted? Husband said I don’t know! I said you are stupid? Want wine! And now I am drinking and making embarrassment!
Eleventh male ticket said to go back to his hometown and break the corn
Male ticket The eleventh said I was going back to my hometown to break the corn. I went out to play alone. I was eating steamed dumplings in the Chenghuang Temple. When I looked up and saw the male ticket walking towards me with a woman in his arms, I turned away without saying a word.
I cried and called my girlfriend Xinxin as I walked. Xinxin drove over to pick me up. As soon as I got in the car, I cried on my seat, crying and fell asleep, and when I woke up I found the car Heading towards Jiangsu, I was surprised, Xin Xin, are you planning to go to his hometown to make trouble? Xin Xin said furiously: What am I making trouble? I was just crowded onto this road at a highway intersection.All right. . .
I didn’t see three of them
Recently, I either went on a blind date or on the way to a blind date. Up to now I have had 5 blind dates, and three of me I didn’t look at them, the two didn’t look at me, and the sixth one was the second one, and it became the second one. What’s more weird is that the other one who didn’t look at me also told the matchmaker to add WeChat chat (My house was not demolished, and I did not win the prize)
Prepare four bowls of imported instant noodles
National Day holiday, universal celebration...Take a baby outing, sit on the high-speed rail...Four bowls of imported instant noodles... When it’s time to eat, it’s under the attention of the whole family , I happily began to dismantle the cup noodles... First, I dismantled the Korean Nongshim and found that there were no chopsticks, which was embarrassing... Then I dismantled the Hong Kong product. Before I left, I found that there were no chopsticks... Four packs in a row, no chopsticks...?? Embarrassing to be crazy... So, I wore 4 carriages and found the high-speed rail dining car... I asked the beautiful waiter sister. There are no chopsticks...I was going to pay for it...Who knows that Miss Sister gave 4 pairs directly...In an instant it feels like we are generous in China and convenient everywhere...In the future, let's buy Master Kong honestly...
In the middle of her eyes, tears came out
I was going back to Guangzhou, and my girlfriend, God of Kitchen, personally cooked and made dishes for me to see me off.
In the middle of her tears came out of her eyes, so pitiful, which made me feel sentimental: okay, okay, it won’t be too late, don’t cry.
Girlfriend: You hama beer, fried chili is in your eyes, don’t hurry up and wipe my eyes. . . .
T, it’s been a long time since labor and management have been emotional, well, this. . .
Don’t clean up here
Go home on eleventh and clean up. Mom cleaned up the carpet on a whim. Dad said : "On the carpet, use a vacuum cleaner to clean it up. Don't clean it up below. Your blood pressure is unstable. Don't be too tired. "
My mother was moved in a mess, but she still lifted the carpet. Looking at the messy renminbi under the carpet, I know that a fierce battle is inevitable...
An uncle in the village has only eight fingers
An uncle in the village has only eight fingers. Everyone asked him why this happened, but he refused to say.
After drinking too much at one time, he told us that when he was young, he went to chop wood, his middle finger was bitten by a poisonous snake, and he immediately cut off his finger and saved his life.
I asked him: If the middle finger is cut, there are still nine? The uncle looked at the sky and said for a long time: I cut off my index finger when I was nervous...and then cut...